


Still...

by MissGreLig



Category: Anne of Green Gables (TV 1985) & Related Fandoms, Anne of Green Gables - L. M. Montgomery, Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Falling In Love, Fluff, Found Family, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Male-Female Friendship, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Renew Anne with an E, Romance, Shirbert, Slow Burn, Unresolved Sexual Tension, first fic lol, mary is alive
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-20
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 19:22:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 20,205
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22820938
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissGreLig/pseuds/MissGreLig
Summary: Gilbert and Anne are study-buds: they had been knowing each other awhile but, suddenly, something inside them is shouting that their relationship is not what it seems to be. Might it be stronger, like love?I'm pretty bad at summaries; I hope the summary suits well lol.This fic is a one-shot that has been living in my head for a while after reading several fics about the Avonlea favourite lovebirds and after being in mourning for the baffling cancelation of the series (#RenewAnneWithAnE).This is my very first fic (embarassed as f***)... and in English (English is not my mother tongue), so I apologise in advance for any mistake or error that sound funny to you; also, I will be glad if someone spot them and tell me so that I correct them asap!I really hope you like it as much as I enjoyed writting it.Love to you all, Anne Nation!
Relationships: Gilbert Blythe & Anne Shirley, Gilbert Blythe/Anne Shirley
Comments: 12
Kudos: 85





	1. For a future... Together?

It was getting dark. Anne could barely read any longer her papers with the flimsy last rays of sun entering from the large window in Gilbert's living room and a lamp placed near the sofa . Needless to say that she was feeling the beginning of a slight headache after spending almost all hours of that Saturday with her nose stuck between all the books, papers and her own notes, only "resting" for fifteen minutes to take lunch. Library was closed for maintenance work that day and, after having walked all the way there from home, she called on Gilbert to plan another place to go to study.

"Why don't you get here? I mean, Bash will come over home today to rest from the hospital, but he won't be here till late tonight and, the latest news I have, my neighbours will spend the weekend with some relatives, so we won't be bothered at all by anyone or anything, only ourselves.", before Anne could turn down or accept it, Gilbert added a little bit rushed, "If you want to come, of course".

"I'll be glad to.", Anne rushed to say too, "But, could you send me your address? I can't remember right now how to get to your place."

Half an hour later, she arrived at Gilbert's with two cups of café-au-latte. It was the least she could make for him at the moment for offering his house for their study session that day; besides, he liked that kind of coffee while he was studying and it would cheer him up (anything she would notice before). After a couple of knocks, a awakened, but still sleepy Gilbert opened the door.

"Haven't you fallen asleep while waiting for me, have you?" Anne teased offering a big smile and his coffee. She had seen Gilbert tired to the edge of falling asleep a couple of times before in the library, but she didn't actually had seen him before in such state and, she didn't know if it was due to the sun entering from the window or these uninvited butterflies in her stomach, she found him a little breath taking. Besides, he was still in his pyjamas and his voice was hoarse… Now Anne didn't feel especially these specific butterflies in her stomach.

"The sun doesn't spin around you, Carrots. I just did get up from bed when you called but...", he teased back, spreading his smile even more when he took his coffee and took a sip. "... I may recognise it is true I did fall asleep again waiting. Wow, thank you for this elixir, Queen Anne".

"Am I now Queen Anne?", she chuckled, "C'mon, let's start with our duties before it is too late".

"I'm gonna change and come back in a couple of minutes. Sit on that table near the window a and settle yourself." Before turning to what Anne presumed it was his room, he approached Anne too close for what she expected to on the first place and hit his cup with her's. "Cheers to the best study-bud in the world and her attention for me, especially when it is coffee".

Anne sipped from her coffee too and, once he entered his room and closed the door, she discovered in herself a stupid grin that crossed her face. She couldn't be falling for Gilbert Blythe, could she? It was true that, as Diana mentioned, they were spending too much time together, but it really wasn't for much more than intensive study sessions. They just liked to compete with the other about who would get better marks on their exams and projects and liked each other's company to reach a total state of concentration, besides talking about everything and anything and other very serious questions, joking around or letting knowing each other a little bit more. Nothing romantical at all; just a normal friendship between a boy and a girl. Why two people from the opposite sex couldn’t be friends?. Still…

Anne lifted her gaze up to Gilbert. The room was darker than she firstly realised a couple of minutes ago, as Gilbert's face was lighted with the light from his iPad. He was concentrated on his reading, his face spoke for himself; his brows were so frown they seemed it was just one brow and his jaw was briefly tight. "He must be reading something interesting about some investigation into women's labour, for sure; otherwise he wouldn't be that interested" thought Anne. From that perspective, Anne would tell that the young man sitting in front of her was actually seventeen years old and not twenty-five. He seemed so young and passionate and strangely attractive to her about whatever he was reading that Anne couldn't help but get lost in his facial expression.

"You are gonna waste my face, Anne, and I won't be lucky ever again with any girl whenever I want to come on to if you don't stop looking at me." Gilbert said without moving his eyes from where he was reading with a straight facial expression, even though Anne knew he was joking.

"What are you reading?" Anne asked curious… And Gilbert blushed. "Definitely, now I really want to know after your reaction".

"It is about… err… how can I say this without sounding… abrupt..."

"Private female parts?" Anne suggested clueless.

"Why, yes! Thank you… Well, I’m studying its reaction to… well, the causes of… when a woman… you know, gets excited."

"Oh", Anne realised, blushing herself too a little bit and a little reluctant to look into Gilbert's eyes directly. She did notice how his eyes became widened while explaining himself. They had never been ashamed to speak about this topic before, what was going on between them now? Anne couldn't fully understand. Before she could get lost in her thoughts, she asked again. "Do you really have to study it? Oh gosh, that's a stupid question… Of course you do. I mean if you have to deeply study it… or it is just notions".

"It is not as deep as for example Winnie did study, but not just notions. The best part of being a friend of a sexologist is that she can hand me some things for a better understanding. Despite these papers being scientifically explicit and providing very good descriptions, Winnie's helps me to reach the peak I want to to mark the difference."

"And do you have real photos of it?" Gilbert turned scarlet, eyes fully open and directed to Anne’s face… and Anne, as scarlet as he was, now wanted to get out of the apartment and walk till she reached Belorussia as the farthest point in geography her, suddenly, scatterbrained imagination worked.

"Sometimes there are real… err… women's private parts photographs; not for pleasure, I may say!" Gilbert commented accelerated, "But not on today’s papers or Winnie's so far. The photos are likely for disease topics, being in the vast majority of papers diagrams. However, it is likely that some photos for this topic will appear. Won't you want to…?", he asked without really wanting to ask.

"No, no. I don't want to see them. I have never asked you about it before and the question just popped out in my mind; just that. But your field of study is just so important… You don’t make yourself an idea of how crucial your work for my genre is. You are there to put a name to those problems that can be found in our organism and investigate to get the best response to fight against them. And to help women with their labour and pregnancy problems… That's so altruistic and generous of you. You really want to give solutions and help and allow children and mothers to live the life they deserve, not as what happened to you and your mum when you were born; that says a lot of you and who you are.”

“Why, Anne, thank you for everything." He thanked the girl in front of him's speech, urging to hold her hands but finally refraining at the end to do so. "You know how much gynecology means to me… When I finally decided back in high school what I wanted for my future, kids were very immature about it suggesting everything but what, for me, was important. It took time for people I care to understand my intentions, but you just did perfectly straight away and I'm glad you got it right. And…, sorry for this but, coming back to reproduction, it’s part of the curriculum and I, of course, have to study it and I kind of enjoy the topic because it helps me to understand a little bit more to you and your needs. I mean, enjoy not in an inappropriate way, needless to say” rushed chuckling Gilbert again that day.

“No probs, I was teasing you about that part. It is not good of you that you don’t allow a good friend as I am to do so.” Anne stuck out her tongue after that and, instinctively, checked her phone. “It is 9pm already?!” she spoke loudly, hurrying to pick her things and putting them on her bag. “And Marilla has even texted me where I am I didn’t call her. Marilla NEVER texts if she didn’t have significant news or is worried… I’d rather think she is worried than there is news; and they are mainly bad news. Oh Gilbert, what if they are bad news?”

“Anne, please, calm down. It won’t be nothing to worry about but how your day went. Just return her call now and you’ll see. If you don’t mind, I can pick up your things for you meanwhile.”

“Oh, Gilbert, I don’t know what I would do without you and your selfless friendship.” she granted with a genuine smile which reflected on her eyes and got mirrored in Gilbert’s eyes too.

“Who told you it is selfless?” He jocked while standing up to do his new core and dodging being hit by a cushion. “Why do you like to hit me with things?” he said at her, remembering that time at the beginning of their relationship when he got kicked by Anne with a heavy volume of a nineteenth century literature analysis' book when he pulled her hair jokingly and calling her the infamous nickname 'carrots'; receiving from Anne, that time instead, a middle-finger as answer. He picked up her things and his too while Anne chatted with her step-mother about her day, smiling when he heard his name and how well she has been feeling today because of his company.

He had been strangely starting to see Anne different… in good terms. It is not that he didn’t notice before, but lately everything involving her has intensified. She is intelligent, passionate, resilient, selfless, warrior, friend, feminist, among other positive descriptions. Gilbert was sure that she would be a great literature teacher and, if the odds were in favour, a great researcher on the nineteenth century feminist literature. He has started to see her physically speaking too; not that he hadn’t seen her before, but now he was becoming aware of her: she barely used make-up, only on a few occasions (“A woman without make-up is as beautiful as she is with it. We do not really need make-up: it is that thing who needs us” he remembered her saying that); she prefered flat shoes and comfortable clothes over the most fashionable trends without losing any trace of being elegant. Today she was wearing a dress suitable for spring time and a denim jacket which intensified her fair skin, her big, bright blues eyes and her auburn hair. He could spend the rest of his days getting lost in the immensity of her eyes; they reminded him of his childhood summer’s holidays in Trinidad when he looked at the sea. And he loved her hair: long and nourished and perfectly different. He couldn’t understand how Anne loathed it; it was like she was actually oblivious to it: her hair was her physical symbol of everything she is and, for Gilbert, was perfect.

He stood frozen beside his desk in his room after realising where his thoughts were leading him. Could he be falling for Anne? Wasn’t he mixing up friendship and admiration with love? No, it was not possible. It was only admiration and friendship towards the girl he had been spending most of his time with the last couple of weeks (almost three months now; not just "weeks", he remarked to himself). Still…

“Gil?” Anne called.

Gilbert appeared next to her and he observed sadded how she had put her jacket back and taken her bag, “Are you leaving?”

“I am, but I can’t find any Uber and I don’t have enough money for a taxi... Perhaps I’ll call Jerry to pick me up; despite that means I spoil his and Diana’s-”

“Stay here.” Gilbert suggested. Anne’s eyes became widened and he could even say that they sparkled due to the invitation. Brave, he continued to extend his invitation. “You could have dinner here and, if it is not too late to feel insecure, you could give a last chance to find an Uber. And if not… You could stay the night without a problem.”

“Would you do that for me?” Gilbert nodded and Anne felt her eyes full of tears. “Oh, Gilbert; thank you, thank you, thank you!”, she hugged him tight and noticed how her hug was returned back. She found her strangely familiar in his arms… as if she had returned home after a time as a wandering walker. His smell was intoxicating; had he ever smelled this good? How she never noticed before? His grip was strong and smooth at the same time; as if he was holding a treasure and that treasure was her… Those butterflies that awoke inside her that morning came again as she squeezed their embrace. Little did she know that all those feelings and sentiments were shared by the young man hugging her back.

The grumbling coming from her tummy broke the sudden spell. They didn’t know how long they spent hugging, but when they released their embrace, they tried to hide whatever they were feeling with jokes about Anne’s "extremely" famine. Anne, meanwhile, texted Diana to inform her about her recent plans, from who received as an -half ignored- answer a couple of emojis with highly sexual reference together with an "A+G" (and also a warm reminder that if something went wrong she would be there in a minute).

They decided to have pizza and pick it from a pizzeria near Gilbert’s apartment, as well as a bottle of wine from a distillery near that pizzeria. At first, Gilbert suggested to have the pizza on the shop, but Anne refused:

“I said it is because I'm tired, but I lied: what if you meet someone and now you stop focusing on your studies?”, she jocked, “I want to beat you fair and square -as you say- on our personal bet, not because of some ephemeral infatuation.”

“Only you would use those words to say that for falling in love with someone.” Gilbert smiled.

"But doesn't such an enormous feeling require the use of profound terms? And I said ephemeral too, I don't think you would fall for someone that quick", replied Anne and Gilbert agreed with a chuckle.

Back in his apartment, they chose a film to watch and started to eat the pizza (finished in a couple of minutes; it seemed that they didn't eat in years) and drink wine. Anne regretted her choice for the bottle of wine… it wasn't as good as she expected, as well that the proof seemed to be higher than what the bottle indicated. The film was shattering bored and since she was a little bit tipsy, she invented a questions game, in which they both had to answer and if any refused to do so, then he or she would have to drink three shots of wine. Questions went from light ones ("Have you ever had a pet?") to more heavy ones ("Tell something embarrassing that happened to you while doing it"), and wine -unexpectedly- did not run. They couldn't tell whether it was because of the undrinkable wine or due to both of them being comfortable with each other's company, and not embarrassed at all to answer anything or even give details if the question requested it.

Anne checked her phone a minute, while helping Gilbert picking up the rubbish generated from dinner. "11:30pm?! How did this even happen?"

"Time flies when you are having fun, Carrots. Or so they say" Gilbert answered from the area of the kitchen (that was his perk: to live in an open space apartment and not paying anything because, well, it was a birthday present for his 18th -a bequeathed apartament, more specifically- a couple of years ago). "Will you leave?", he asked, with a spark of hope in his voice.

"Your taking hostage plan finally was successful, my dearest kidnapper. Shall I send a warning letter with a finger on it to Diana to let her know about this?" Anne suggested jokingly.

"Nah, I prefer not to play butchers today; it’s too late and blood is highly inconvenient to be cleaned." Gilbert returned the joke and told her. "Ok, then, since you are staying, you'll sleep in my room and I will sleep on the sofa. I would stay in Bash's former room, but since he is coming…" he shrugged.

"Are you kidding?" Anne asked a little offended, but playful "You will sleep in your own bed and I will do it on the sofa. There is no problem, it is comfortable and…" she said while she stretched on the sofa, pretending she was getting comfortable for her sleeping hours "... cozy and soft. It doesn't make you terribly miss your bed even if you want to…" she continued elaborating her reasons while saw Gilbert approaching to the sofa with a smug smile on his lips. It was when he was closer to her, when Anne saw the intentions behind that smile.

"You know, Anne? You shouldn't tell everything about yourself, because even your friends can take advantage of it." As he finished, he bent himself over Anne and started to tickle her whenever he could. Anne could not stop laughing herself to tears and try, in vain, to stop Gilbert from “turtoring” her.

Gilbert watching, listening and feeling Anne the way he was doing and Anne watching, listening and feeling Gilbert the way she was doing were becoming, unknowingly, their favourite place in the world and, whenever in a future they felt they were sad or having a bad moment, this would be their happy place to go.

Taking advantage of a moment of weakness from Anne, Gilbert took her arm and pulled her out of the sofa, where he quickly laid himself now, looking straight to Anne and telling her mockingly "Yep, you are right: I won't miss my bed tonight".

Anne tried the very same strategy Gilbert employed with her before to get him out of the sofa; this time sitting on his thighs to reach better to him, but Gilbert put his hands on Anne's shoulders pushing her from tackling him. As Gilbert's arms got tired because of the position and the effort being made, he involuntarily pushed them back, bringing Anne in that way closer to him.

Now she was lying on him, their chests clinging to one another and feeling how their breathing was now heavier, as if they were suffocating. Their legs were tangled, not being sure which one's were Anne's and which Gilbert's. Her arms and hands were resting on his chest and shoulders, while his were around her back and waist in a similar way they were when hugging her before. Their faces were close to one another, no laughing signs left in their lips or eyes, but another feeling. 

Anne never noticed Gilbert's face as she was doing now: he had freckles too below his eyes and in his nose, but not as noticeable as her's. His eyebrows, generally so expressive, now didn't say a thing. His mouth suddenly felt edible and Anne didn't know if she could hold herself any longer from tasting them. And his eyes… They were a fairy tale: they were telling the story of a boy who never saw light, and now he discovered the sun and couldn't keep his eyes out of it, even though he knew he could get sore.

Gilbert could appreciate Anne's face the closer he always wanted to see. Her face, pale as fine china, was decorated with freckles, as a symptom that warm weather and sun was coming back again after an endless winter. Her eyelashes were red coloured too, but the tip of them were blonde; making her even more special than he thought she was. Her eyes… They reminded him of Trinidad, when he and his dad went each summer holiday to visit his old good friends Hazel and Bash and spent the days looking at the sea, but now he could see his own reflection mixed on the immensity of that shade of blue and he wished he could frame it forever. Her nearly parted lips were naturally red, as strawberries, and Gilbert wondered if he tasted them, would receive that same flavour or another much better, from which he would become an addict.

They didn't notice that, the more they got lost in each other's face, the closer they were getting. Just a little bit more, and they would be kissing, just a little bit more…

"AHEM"

Anne raised from Gilbert leaving him enough space to lift himself too, and looked over the sofa to the source of such an inconvenient sound. Bash had just entered into the apartment, the door closed (“How couldn’t I listen to the keys and the door?” Anne and Gilbert asked themselves), holding in one hand the keys of the apartment and in the other a small bag, while dressing an enormous smile on his face.

Anne flew from Gilbert, and drew her attention and words to Bash in order to avoid as much as possible the man seconds before was about to devour. "Bash! I'm so happy to see you! How's Mary and the baby? I heard from, uh, Gilbert that the baby might come sooner than everyone expects…"

Bash, politely, answered every question Anne had, as he knew she was just trying to pretend that he caught them almost red handed, making his smile even bigger than it was.

When Gilbert finally recovered his voice, he addressed Anne "I, uh, I'll give you a pyjamas, and definitely you'll sleep in my room". He went to his room, took a pyjamas and returned to hand it to Anne, barely looking at her.

"Thank you. Well, I better go to bed now… I'm tired and I need to rest". She apologised not totally true and headed to Gilbert's room. "Good night Bash; give tomorrow my best vibes to Mary and the baby, and tell her I want to see her face soon! Good night, Gilbert; thank you".

"Good night" muttered almost inaudible Gilbert.

"Good night, Anne-girl. Hope you got tonight the most delightful dreams" almost sung Bash, indeed, still smiling. Once the door closed, Bash turned over himself to look at Gilbert, who stood idiotly looking at the closed door, and said "I knew it was her all this time. You could not fool me Blythe, I knew it from the very first time you told me you met her!"

"I'll pick up a blanket and pillows" Gilbert answered, without helping to grow a foolish smile that confirmed Bash's accusations. "Please, give this helplessly in love med student a quick update of Mary and Delly's progress before going to sleep."

Oblivious to the confession being made on the other side of the door, Anne changed into the pyjamas Gilbert lent her. Gladly intoxicated because of the scent of him she perceived from the clothes and untangling her hair with her own hands, she contemplated the room. There was one big closet on the wall close to the door, next to the window's wall where a desk was placed. It was a mess: med books, human body's drawings and diagrams and a great variety of notebooks, books and papers were placed there ("Just like any other student", thought Anne). One of the walls was full of posters of hockey players and tickets of some games being played in Toronto ("I didn't know he was a sport-guy, good to know"). Just on the wall where the bed was, it was where the treasure was found: a framed family tree and several photos placed making a circle. To see them closer, Anne had to climb the bed and approached them.

Anne observed the family tree. There were no photos, just names. That is how she found out Gilbert's mother was named Gertrude, and his father John; whose father was named Gilbert too. Then, Anne assumed that Gilbert John, the boy who has been so tender to her since the very beginning and was increasing his tenderness every day that passed, was named so after his grandfather and his father. Anne wished to have some of this, so that she could know where she came from… But, despite the fact that she tried with the support of Marilla and Matthew -her guardian angels, who took her from the instability of the orphanage-, she didn't find anything at all. Luckily, she was now part of the Cuthbert - Anne Shierly Cuthbert, precisely- despite the blood and that was all that it counted; now she had a family of her own and, sort of, could write her "own" family tree.

The photos were arranged thoroughly: those making the border of the circle and getting to the centre, were just memories of Gilbert in school, high school and uni with some friends -to whom some of them, like Winnie, Diana or Moody, recognised-; making Anne watch Gilbert grow through the years in just seconds. Those three photographs making the centre took Anne's breath away: one of them was an old picture of a pregnant woman and a man who was embracing her from behind. They were smiling and Anne could see Gilbert in both faces: his mother had the same hair colour and texture, nose and eyes colour than her son, and his father had the same body complexity that Gilbert has, and, with the exception of his mother's, the same face and facial features. Anne felt her heart warmed realising that Gilbert's parents were still alive in him, not only because of their memory but also physically speaking.

The other photo was a recent one: a heavy pregnant Mary with little Delly was smiling big when being sandwiched by Gilbert and Bash, while the two touched the bare belly of Mary. The happiness that Anne saw disappeared from some of the photos surrounding that one was the one which illuminated this picture. Gilbert might have lost his family friend blood just like her, but found the love that firstly a bad labouring practice and then a severe cancer was taken away from him. He found a brother and a sister on that Trinitarian man and that Canadian woman, soon to be the uncle he never expected to be.

The last one was the one which, if any of the other almost did, made Anne cry silently from happiness. It was a photo of the two of them. She remembered it as if it was yesterday: they were in Avonlea, back home with Diana and other friends, for the after-exams’ week break. He was staying at hers because Green Gables was big enough to invite people to stay in a couple of days -even though he slept in a room on the other end of the corridor. Marilla was still a little baffled with those things. One of those days, they decided to have a picnic near the Lake of Shining Waters and to stay there to watch the sunset. Just as the sun was setting, Anne stood and began to dance from the music being played at the moment. Gilbert couldn't resist himself and began to dance with her, being the moment captured. They were smiling at each other with a mocking face, their eyes barely seen because of the intense smiles. Her hair was like fire: the strong rays of the setting sun coloured it redder that it was and was marvellous. She never liked her hair, except in that picture… that's why she also had it framed in her room too.

Anne, after being overwhelmed with all those recent feelings, the almost kiss she had before with that guy and, recognising herself at least that she wasn't having a crush with Gilbert but she have fallen in love with him, wanted to get out of the room and kiss him till their lips were swollen and aching. However, she refrained, as she still could hear Bash talking to him, and she didn't want to make a scene. Thus, she promised herself that, just in the morning, the first thing she did when she saw him, was to give that kiss that they couldn't give to each other before and was due to be given.

She just made herself comfortable in the bed, smelling deep the scent of his beloved Gilbert and tasting the remaining flavour of the wine -from now on, her favourite wine-, she fell asleep hopeful for the following day that, fortunately, changed their relationship.


	2. Get on your Dancing Shoes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I never expected to update this, but once you start it is impossible to stop!  
> I hope this chapter is easier to follow for the native speakers (or anyone who has a proficiency level of English). I try my best to make it as good as I can, but errors and mistakes always emerge.  
> The chapter's title is an Arctic Monkeys song. I cannot say it is related to the chapter itself, but you can join the dots if you like!  
> Since I'm pretty bad at descriptions, please, look at these links for my description of Anne: https://www.instagram.com/p/B81p6Hwi8pH/ and https://www.tumblr.com/search/georgia+amsale+summer+2018+edit+by.
> 
> Hope you like it!

Anne could not help it. It wasn't even five minutes from the last time she looked out the window to see if there were people coming when she did it again.

"Anne", her bosom friend Cole caught her attention back to him and whatever he had been telling her, where he was sitting in the bed of the room assigned for that night, "it's not even time yet for guests to come, you haven't made your mind up with the make-up and the hairstyle -ANNE SHIRLEY CUTHBERT, DON'T LOOK AT ME LIKE THAT BECAUSE YOU KNOW YOU NEED TO WEAR MAKE-UP TO TOTALLY KILL IT-, I do have to prepare myself too and I bet you're going to notice Gilbert even before you can see him. So, PLEASE, take consideration of your friend, decide something to help with if I need to and let me prepare myself to shine" he finished amending his perfect flirty quiff and mischievously smiling at Anne.

Anne wanted to deny it, but she couldn't. It had passed a few weeks since she recognised herself she was hopelessly in love with Gilbert and tried to open up herself to him; but she finally couldn't (Delly was born that very morning she decided to speak about her fellings, and Anne accompanied the newly dad and godfather/uncle to the hospital). She also opened up to her friends that very afternoon after coming back from the hospital. They cheered her and were happy for her to be (at last!) sincere to herself; but since then they were a bit a pain in the arse with their constant reminder of Anne's feelings for the young doctor-to-be. As she didn't want to come back to that topic (she had enough with herself and her consciousness), she digressed the course of the conversation to the other part of Cole's turn.

"You're right, a little make-up won't kill me. BUT", she anticipated pointing at Cole with her finger, "it will be as natural as possible; you know I would like to recognise myself in the mirror when I check your creation. Besides, I think that Diana's Summer Ball is the perfect time for that Lizzie Bennet's hairstyle inspo we have practiced before" Anne said excitedly for Diana's thematic 24-years-old party. According to the invitation letter (and Diana, Anne and Cole’s demand), people should be dressed in Period-like clothes as they pleased or could afford, but it should be anything from the 1930s below. Moreover, it was hosted in Diana’s family’s old Victorian house in Toronto -even though she and her family was native from Avonlea-, which passed generation after generation as a heirloom of their power since the late 19th Century. It was big enough to take a large bunch of people not only for dinner but also for dance; in addition, it has a large back garden which reminded Anne of those she imagined while reading her favourite classic novels.

"If it is that one I am thinking of, then make sure you finally get to dance with your Mr. Darcy" Cole commented it again. "You can lie to yourself, Anne, but I know something is wrong with Gilbert. I mean, with the fact you properly like him. What is it?"

"I don't know", Anne scoffed, "I know that I am Diana's best friend and my place belongs here today and I feel completely grateful and even kind of dutiful towards Diana's birthday organisation and everything, but… I don't know. I thought- I believed Gilbert was going to ask me to come with him today; not Winifred. I know it’s silly and I don’t really want him to have asked even. It is just… like every single quasi-signal I have received from him, every time we have been together, everytime we have been in those delightful silence... it has been a product of my imagination. It's been only a few times I have passed with him accustomed to the time I usually spend; but final exams and final projects have separated us and have made us not talking at all for a while and it's been hard in those terms... Not talking, I mean. And now I feel awful for all this" she finished bringing a hand to her face, as trying to hide her own shameful eyes and blushing cheeks from Cole.

"Anne, please" Cole stood up and walked to face her, taking her hand to see her fully, "Don't hide; at least from me! I am one of your kindred spirits and won't judge you. You are having a level of insecurity I have never thought I would see in your. And about a boy, dear goodness!", he chuckled, "Anne, you are ever more in love than I thought! I mean… jealousy is not even and ever be a good sign, in love but we can't help it feeling it sometimes; and I know this is not your normal state and that you already despise it and would not like to feel it. It is just a product of that stupid and nonsensical insecurity that love has brought you this time, and, I reckon, it might be because you haven't spoken to him yet as you would like to have done. I know your thing with Roy back in Queens can't be compared with what it's happening right now; you liked him and were right in that relationship, but not the way you like Gilbert. I feel -well, everyone notices it except you two- that this has hit you harder than you thought at first. And it's nothing to be ashamed of; but proud. If you were already a beautiful person, now you are even better; ask anyone and they will compare you to a rose which, even though it blossoms pretty every spring, this season has become the most beautiful of all flowers. And Gilbert's influence has brought you that.

Besides, you should see him every time we talk about Roy or any other boy who might be attracted to you: he becomes green of envy; believe me" Anne chuckled this time not fully believing "Don't laugh, it's true! And, again, I'm not justifying jealousy, you know what I mean. If it weren't for that veil you both seem to be covering your eyes, you both would see how madly in love are you with each other-" Cole was cut off by Anne's hug, tears and whisperings "thank yous". Cole hugged her back and added, almost crying too, "Besides, you know that it is impossible for him to fall in love with Winifred; they have known each other long now, and are so opposite in the spectrum that it is what makes their friendship go as it is. And, you know, Winifred would flirt with you harder than Gilbert is doing if he weren't into you. You have seen her with other girls and you know that's true. She is everything but shy", Anne laughed again and with a smile, decided it was time to get ready for the party and gossiped a little about Diana's being helped by Jerry. 

"Maybe" Cole said while leaving her room to prepare himself before helping her for the final touches, "tonight is the day that you have always daydreamt about between your Mr Gilbert Darcy and you will thank Diana even more for today" he winked at her before closing the door.

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At the end, Anne's hair wasn't made as she wanted to wear it. After trying to imitate several times that one of the Pride and Prejudice film, Cole gave up and convinced Anne to try another and the result was even as breathtaking; at least, considering Anne's untameable hair when hairstyles were meant.

Anne stood at the stairs, considering to take the lead down to go to the room where the party was held. Despite the final result left her wordless, she couldn't help feeling self-conscious. "Let's go?" Cole asked, in a beautiful dark burgundy suit and a beige ruffle shirt accompanied with a hand made mask in the same tones of his dresses and in black little details. Anne, a little bit surprised by his unusual selection of dark colours, looked at him with wide open eyes. "You know", answered Cole, "I have always had this thing for the image film industry had sold us about vampires; you shouldn't be that surprised at all. It is going to be the rest of the guests who will be eclipsed and open-mouthed by you and you know it. I mean, stunning, beautiful or any other adjective of that semantic field does not do justice on how you are today."

"Aw, Cole, you are such a poet today and I lack the words to express my deep gratitude for them, isn't that odd coming from me?" Anne had never been in such a state of wordlessness and clumsiness with her friends; she even was named mockingly the scriber of the group. What was happening to her lately? "But I am even proud of the work I've done with you. You can use words beautifully and fluently as I do now! The pupil surpasses the master." She sincerely said and grasped the arm Cole offered her since the beginning.

"Before entering there: remember, you are always beautiful and one of the most amazing people I have ever seen. You are not less than anybody else in there and you earned your place in here long ago. Neither Josies, Janes nor Billies have been right and, if they try to let you down today, don't give them that pleasure. They would probably be jealous of you." Anne almost cried again. She didn't know how he did it, but Cole could always see her problem right away, and gave her those words she needed to reassure herself again. "I can't wait for Gilbert's reaction to see you". He winked at her and started to go down the stairs.

Once on the foot of the stairs, Anne looked astonished at her surroundings. Despite she had organised the ruling of whatever in the party was involved, what she saw and felt was beyond the scope of her living imagination: the ceiling decorations were from Cole, who made them with recycled materials for his final project at School Art (for which he received the top mark of his year!) based on the influence of Victorian gardens and arrangement of flowers and trees and plants' leaves of that era mixed with coloured lights that gave the impression of an enchanted forest. Some garlands full of flowers and leaves fell from the ceiling, as well as butterflies and birds figures. In the corners of the places where people were supposed to stay -that is, the dining room, the main entrance and the ballroom which led to the back garden- were pseudo-logs lifted to the ceiling meeting with these flowers and leaves. If Anne were asked, she would say that everything she always painted in her mind whenever she read about forests and gardens in her books was brought to life. No wonder why Cole was congratulated so frequently. The ball room was dominated by the DJ booth, which would play throughout night classical pieces of music to give an impression of older times to the situation and, at some point, modern music; "Similar to The Great Gatsby's soundtrack" Dianna explained a week ago.

Also, people gave this fantasy even more tangible: all of them were dressed according to the requirements in Diana's invitation. Pompous and luxurious dresses from different periods made women even more beautiful than they usually were, and the astonishing and wonderous suits made men look so smart and, even to some of them, good-looking. She could spot Ruby and Moody, the recent new couple that no one expected: she looked surprisingly beautiful in a pink flapper dress and a matching headdress, as everyone expected her to be dressed as a princess (for all of the girls in the Avonlea group, Ruby was known to be the most attracted to princesses and fairy tales; even more than Anne herself!). Moody, in a 20s-ish cream tartan suit accompanied her in some details, as the same shade of pink for the handkerchief in his blazer's pocket or the socks. Anne spotted some of her other friends too, as Tillie or the Pauls. Fortunately, Anne didn't see either Josie, Jane or Billy the whole night; and if she saw them, she didn't recall the moment, so it was as if they even weren't there.

Diana's acquaintances from Cole's Art School caught their attention and lauded the pair at the same time Cole and Anne contemplated the magical scene. Small talk continued and, since Anne was too distracted overlooking people arriving at the house, suddenly she found herself alone.

She tried to look for Cole again among people, blending with them on her quest. She saluted some people she knew and suddenly, she saw him.

"Oh, no. Why didn't Diana tell me he was here too?" She told herself before he could listen to her, as she saw him approaching her. "Oh my! Is it Charlie Sloane himself who I am seeing?" she smiled at him falsely. However, he wouldn't tell that; his crush on her was so blind he couldn't see that his attempts to flirt with her were everything but flattering. Anne had many times made clear that she wasn't into him and wanted to remain as friends, but either he didn't notice it or he just left out that and continued with his goal.

"Anne," he muttered, "has anybody told you how beautiful you are tonight? You just overshadowed yourself; you could be more beautiful if you tried in daily life." He managed to utter after a long time in silence, observing her from the bottom to the top with, to Anne's opinion, a disgusting look.

"A couple of persons have, indeed" she smiled again, trying to apologise and punch him in the face. She scolded herself for doing that and tried to direct the conversation to the party. Impartiality was best if she wanted to, at least, have a cordial relationship with him. They small talked about what they liked about the decoration, the food and what they were looking forward to the night and, if she would have known before, she would have just avoided that, apparently, safe topic.

"I can't wait for the dance tonight" Charlie said, looking intensely at her. "I have been practicing the whole month for us to dance".

"Us?" Anne couldn't control herself on repeating his last word in total horror. Hadn't he just assumed…?

"Yes. I mean, when I asked to dance with you once I learnt about the party and the theme and you told me you would eventually say something, I assumed you didn't want to accept right away in front of your friend and embarrass him. And since you have spent too much time with him and your studies, you couldn't say anything to me earlier; I think he might have a crush on you, you know? How was his name? Pilbert?"

"Gilbert" Anne corrected him quite upset. He was just ignoring her refusals to a love relationship to all cost and living in his lie. He hadn't a crush on her: he just was obsessed with her. She was, infuriated, going to tell him a thing or two, but she was cut off.

"Right. Well, I just saw the people I'm coming with and I have been a while disappeared looking for you. See you later", he winked at her, caressing her bare arm, and left.

Anne, flabbergasted with the situation, couldn't move. She did not want to spoil Diana's party by doing a scene, but Charlie was calling for it and if it was given the situation, it would totally happen. How could he assume things without really paying attention to the truth? How could he REALLY expect Anne to like him if he behaved like a prick with her, without respecting her at all? She tried too many times to make everything clear between them; she didn't know what else to do to wake him up of his stupid dream.

"This is unbelievable" she said out loud.

"That's what I was just thinking."

The voice Anne had been daydreaming of hearing all day (and all weeks, haunting her even in her night dreams) came from her back.

She turned to it and, again in mere minutes but with different reasons, stood wordless before him. It was him, as always, but the suit made it all. It was an exact replica of that of Matthew Crawley in Downton Abbey. In a hand, he carried a simple white mask. She had been talking about that suit and how flattering would be on men for a while (before that night at his place; before her veil was lifted and realised her love for him). And he was there on that. She couldn't retain the big smile drawing on her face looking at him. He was just handsome. No, graceful. No, better, majestic. She couldn't really tell: words just didn't fit the reality of him. Anne liked him in all his forms -physically speaking; she fell for him primarily because of his character and intellect-, but suits would always be her flaw. And Gilbert in a suit was… kind of hot. He tried to put under control his curls, but it didn't work at the end; hair was a little damped after he washed it to make it a little more decent. This made Anne chuckle at her realisation.

She was so lost in him that she could see the look Gilbert had because of her.

The whitest gown, with silver and golden coloured sequins and a green strip marking her waist, he had ever seen did not make her pale. The opposite effect: it highlighted her porcelain skin and her fire-like hair, which was held at the beginning as a plait but left the rest fall into her back in defined waves, almost covering her bare back. And today she wore make-up, but only people who saw her without it could really tell that. It just was so natural that it seemed she didn't wear any; it highlighted her face in such ways that Gilbert didn't think it was even possible. She just was perfect how she already was and it was just a little improvement: her eyes were bigger and bluer, her cheeks more rosy than ever and her mouth, in that glossy lipstick, more edible than ever. He bet that the green and white mask she held in her hands would give the final touch to the spell she was making tonight; enchanting everyone who looked at her, and specially to Gilbert himself. How could people ever call her ugly and other nasty things when she was a goddess coming to Earth?

"Wow" he muttered, while approaching her without noticing and directing the sight from her, as he could not utter anything better to fit his reality.

"Yes, wow" she did copy him.

They were so close now, that sort of reminded them that night at Gilbert's, before they were interrupted by Bash. If it weren't for it, they would have kissed. They would have confessed their sudden realisation of love. They would have come today as a couple. And the kiss they were about to give would not be their first one to each other.

"Oh, here you are! You disappeared while I saw this client and I- oop". Winnie came and cut herself off. She lifted her eyebrows up and drew a knowing smile while the pair rushely separated from one another with scarlet faces. Oh, she loved it; her favourite ship was about to kiss and she just interrupted; like in those fanfictions she loved to read. "I'm so sorry, guys. I didn't want to interrupt anything".

"No worries" Anne tried to hide her frustration and her scarlet cheeks in a true smile to Winnie and avoided looking at Gilbert as much as possible. How were they always interrupted? "I was going to ask him where you were! Since you showed me the fabric of your dress I have been waiting to see it. And, look at you!" She took Winnie's hands and watched Winnie's work. "You are beautiful, you look like a Edwardian Cinderella… Aesthetically speaking, you know. I just cannot believe your magic with needlework; if you aren't doing well with therapies, you can become a designer for sure. And I would be your faithful customer and would pay whatever you asked; even if I had to ask for a loan." They laughed.

"I'm ok by now telling people how to manage their sex lives; but I take the advice, dear". She winked and hugged her. With that cunning aspect that made Winnie be the person she was, she started to praise Anne too. "I have already told you, but you are fantastic in that dress. I love how the neckline fits in your breasts and joins with the sleeves; oh I love they are frills and the game they play when you move your arms. I mean… you are delightful. Well, you are always divine. And looks like those Greek muses' sculptures Gilbert loves. And a bride, to be honest; don't you think, Gilbert?" And looked at him with a little bit of malice. She has been noticing the whole time how he was looking at their dynamic and, specially to Anne. Winnie just wanted to give that push that both needed to finally become that powerful couple everyone knew they would be.

"Yes, she looks divine" he managed to say, with his eyes fixed on Anne's eyes.

"Thank you; you also look divine", she muttered too.

Winnie, watching the scene, couldn't help to analyse the situation and to raise an eyebrow victoriously. A conversation wasn't what these two needed, but (let's say it) mingle and then say everything that needed to be said. It was so clear for everyone but them… They would not spoil their friendship, but strengthen it; and it wouldn't happen as it happened with Roy or Christine. This time, real and strong and genuine feelings were awoken. And they learnt of their mistakes; those would not happen again. "Duh", Winnie said herself, grinning while thinking, "they might be brains but when love is on the table they are clueless. Well, that's why I work as a therapist and now how to fix it; this funny situation won't last long".

Suddenly, Cole arrived to them breaking the spell the -hopefully- soon-to-be couple were in and, after saluting everyone and praising Anne's soon-to-be beau and Winifred, took Anne apart and drove them to next to Diana, as she was about to make her entrance and they were required on their positions.

Anne looked back again to Gilbert, and smiled at him excusing herself for her departure. He smiled her back understandingly in that way that drove her mad. And that's the last time Anne saw him before everything went kind of blurry.

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Party was going as it should. Dinner tables were well placed; people sitting at them were enjoying the meals prepared and the company. She didn't know if it was Cole's or Diana's idea, but she had a direct view of Gilbert's sitting place throughout dinner time. Although she did really pay attention to her group's conversation and participated, she spent the whole time looking at him (little did she know it also happened the other way around): how he talked, how he laughed, how probably was speaking about something in his last days of hospital practices and last exams to finally be 'Dr. Blythe" by the serious facial expression he drew on his face sometimes… On some occasions, their sights crossed and coloured their checks, so Anne took the initiative on making a toast every time that happened to make the situation less bizarre. That's why she ended up more drunk than she planned by dinner time.

She didn't remember how she ended on the dance floor with her friends and Winnie and Gilbert after finishing the second plate. At that moment, she didn't overthought why Gilbert didn't speak to her; modern music was played and they all were having such a good time. It wasn't the perfect moment to open their hearts. Suddenly, realising that Moody's face was unclear when she looked at him for a moment while dancing, Anne excused herself and went to the bathroom. "You cannot be this drunk, Anne. You, simply, cannot" she told herself looking at her reflection in the mirror. Fortunately, she was alone there; "It's just ridiculous! I can do better to face him… But he is so exquisite today that I need extra help. No, Anne. Think of Marilla: she would scold you for behaving as a fool, and you are not a fool at all. So you are going to calm yourself and be alcohol-free and brave; and if something happens, then happens". After breathing a couple of times, feeling relaxation cover all the spots in her body and trying to come back to herself (and doing some physiological necessities), Anne felt herself again and promised one last time not to drink anymore the rest of the night. Cole was waiting for her at the bathroom's door when she went out. He might have chased her there in case she needed something. That's something Diana would normally do, but tonight was her night, and she was sufficiently overwhelmed with her family and other acquaintances and was understandable for her not paying too much attention to them.

"Better now?" He asked, and Anne nodded in agreement. "That contest were stupid for both of you. And he is a doctor, he knows that's not good at all and should have signalled you to stop. But I could even tell he was as nervous as you". Anne asked how he knew. "Darling, except for those who have no clue, it was evident you both drank for not throwing yourselves into each other's arms." Anne babbled trying to deny it, but it was worthless. Cole continued "if you both love your friends, please, please, I'm begging: make out tonight and confess your feelings. Tension is going to drive us all crazy". He laughed and kissed Anne's red cheek to give her strength and confidence. He didn't know how, but he knew that tonight something between his friend was finally to happen.

Time passed and the DJ asked people to put on their masks, as the waltz and pair dances were about to start. Anne felt excited at first, as she was finally to dance as she imagined as a child. She was dancing with Cole happily doing their best and laughing at how people of their age didn't know how to properly waltz (except for Diana and Jerry, Moody and Ruby and Gilbert and Winnie. "Is he good at everything?", wondered Anne)... Till she saw him among the audience. "Oh no. I totally forgot: Charlie is waiting for this turn to end and dance with me. My hopes for a perfect night dashed, Cole!" She said worried and thinking on how she would amend the circumstances before he could do anything.

"We'll figure out something, don't worry" said Cole just when music finished and people began to applaud. A saviour hand grasped Anne's forearm and a soft voice said "Anne, I need you to come with me".

Winnie pretended to be anxious for something and, worried for whatever it might happened to her or -worse- Gilbert, Anne followed her. Once in the garden, in a hidden place to the eyesight, they sat on a rock bench. A few seconds later, Winnie received a message of Cole saying that, for the rest of the world -that is, Charlie- they were smoking outside.

"But I do not smoke; I despise it," Anne said naively.

"But Charlie doesn't know it and he won't bother you for a while. I overheard you and I imagined something quick to take you out", Winnie replied with a reassuring smile.

"Then I'm a chain-smoker," Anne concluded and laughed.

"You know?" Winnie said after a moment later in complete silence, "I was jealous of you when I first met you". Anne became surprised at it and asked "How is it possible?"

"Well," Winnie started, "I was afraid you would take away my best friend. Did you know he is in love with you since the incident with the book? I mean, he deserved it, he was a prick at the time" Winnie kicked and confessed ("Tonight is the night" Winnie told herself). "And did you know that Gilbert and I were once a couple? But for a couple of weeks, not much long" This shocked Anne, but not as much as she thought it would do; she kind of expected that: Winnie and Gilbert's friendship was based on something stronger than a simple friendship. Winnie continued:

"It all started at high school. I was raised in Montreal, but moved here when I was sixteen. I knew nobody for a while and I was then too shy to make friends… except for my neighbour. He didn't have real friends at the moment; his father was dying and they were interested more in his future fortune than in himself. I don't need to describe him, by the way: I bet you have already admired him." She said smugly, making Anne chuckle. "My family thought that he and I would make a wonderful couple, and, given the case, our businesses would merge and grow and become two of the greatest companies in Canada. However, John never saw that: he saw that good friend his son would have once he, unfortunately, wasn't around anymore. He would have loved you. I heard a lot about Gertrude to know that you would somehow remind John to her." That fact made both women get a little emotional: one remembering one of the men who knew before anybody what was going on with her, and the other trying to picture the man who raised the person she was in love with. "And he would have told you both something to stop dancing around each other like you are doing. Besides… I always think John knew before me. The reason why I wasn't for his son.

When he died and Gilbert left school for a couple of months to work hard in Trinidad and to settle himself in his new reality, I finally made friends. Girls would always speak about how boys were getting hot and muscular and other things… But, even though I saw it and sometimes I agree with them, I could notice it too with girls." Winifred melancholically grinned. "I couldn't speak with anybody about it: I knew people would despise me… So I remained in silence till Gilbert came back and all changed. He had to retake the year, so we weren't anymore in the same class; but he came wiser and mature. Working the lands there made him clear too about gynecology, trusting Bash the leadership of his father's business and an improved person; more than a person could ask an eighteen years old boy. And the physical work made him be stronger, which was worked at the same time his physical growth towards maturity… Imagine girls" Winnie looked at Anne knowledgeably and both women laughed. "I didn't want any of them to take advantage of him… Because behind that appearance, I knew Gilbert felt like shit, and was bloodily sad and hurt. So, in order to protect him, I asked him out… and he accepted." Anne looked at Winnie: didn't she was playing with him, then, too? And did he really like Winnie that way to start wooing? "At first, I thought it was what must be done. Everyone expected it, and I was protecting for doing something stupid, and cover that pain with girls and idiots who liked him because of his position in society, and not him.

The night we first kissed, I felt nothing. I mean, I felt I liked him, but not those butterflies that were supposed to arise. I knew he felt the same because we looked at each other and told us that without words. It was our third date and our last as a couple. Next day I went to his place and told him why I did that, and, instead of being furious, he understood" Winnie was crying and Anne was too. She was seeing a sister to him, who tried to mend him in the wrong way, but actually didn't hurt him. "That moment I also became brave and told him what was happening to me: I liked one of the girls in his class, who also happened to like girls… and wanted to try something with her. Gilbert and I made a deal that moment he understood and embraced me more than I already were: we would cover us till it was necessary; he would pretend to be my boyfriend till I left high school, and I would help him to not become a dick because of his pain. And we did… I only regret that I couldn't stop him from dating Christine. What I tried so hard to prevent, a girl made it in six month of relationship. And you know the rest: a year later a girl as radiant as her red hair whacked him with a book and became the Gilbert we all knew".

Anne through her arms to Winnie's neck. They both needed that conversation. Their beginning wasn't the perfect one: Anne believed Winnie was his girlfriend and Winnie believed Anne was to hurt him. But they were wrong, and they recognised that soon and amended their relationship as quickly as possible.

"I'm kind of telling you that Gilbert has always been the man you know nowadays, and this is my version of the circumstances. I know Gilbert has told you his version… and he never has done that with anyone. You are a lucky girl, Anne. You have the key to his heart even before he knew he gave it to you; and the other way round." Winnie fixed their make-ups; the party wasn't over yet and things still were to happen. "If this were one of my therapy sessions, I would say you should do the "old people business", but I know what is happening is bigger than that, and that you have found light in the darkness at last. You had the opportunity to meet him in his worst too and you are still by his side. It has happened with him too, and he is by your side. You won't spoil what you got if you are brave and say what it needs to be said. I promise". Music inside finished, indicating that another song was about to start.

"Come on, Anne", Winnie stood and took her hand to come back to the room after fixing their masks and giving another hug, "Your Mr Crawley is longing for you".

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Even though he saw both of them leave, Gilbert asked Cole what was taking them so long outside.

"They'd probably be criticising you, don't worry" replied Cole the last time Gilbert asked and smirked.

Gilbert hated being that impatient; he'd never been like that before and now that his other sister and his lover (or he expected that to be) were together and having a good time, he was behaving foolishly. Besides, he noted that Charlie Sloane was also too interested in both of them, and didn't like that. "Great," Gilbert thought, "now I'm jealous of him even though I know nothing would happen between him and Anne. And I'm a little bit tipsy too… Gilbert, today you made your day great".

He was so absorbed in his thoughts he didn't notice that it was playing a new song and a pair of hands took his. It was only that he realised he wasn't surrounded by people anymore when he looked at who took his hands and was making them ready to dance.

He felt like falling, his knees weakening when he saw his Anne smile at him so fully it seemed he was going to explode. She was so beautiful; so, so breathtaking that he thought he couldn't help it anymore. He needed to confess what he felt. When he was with her, he was a contradiction: stronger than ever, but weak; braver, but vulnerable; euphoric but terrified. And Gilbert knew, deep, deep inside him that Anne felt that too.

Gilbert didn't want to fail again; he trusted in Christine and she played with him like a puppet. But Anne wasn't her.ñ: she was loveable and loyal and sincere. As sincere as her eyes now they were so close.

He reminded them of their almost kiss in his house before being interrupted by Bash. They were that close. Their smells intertwined, and if he pulled his head closer, their lips would do the same. If it weren't by people God knows he would do it. And Anne would accept that; her eyes were telling him. Her eyes were telling him of their shared love, of how they found each other after some hard blows and it was their moment to rely on the love they were willing to give to each other. It was not something fleeting, it was strong and had come to stay.

He examined her face again, at the same time she examined him: she had been crying, but he could tell it wasn't because she was hurt. Again, her eyes were watery, and full of (what he hoped for it was) love. Her nose was red, as her cheeks when he saw her earlier in the night were because of the weeping. Her skin still remained the same as always, but the dress allowed him to spot her freckles. She has always told him she hated them, but, if she ever allowed him, Gilbert would worship and admire them, as constellations and stars in the sky.

For a moment, time seemed to stop for them. If they stopped dancing, they wouldn't tell. It was as he was in a room, alone, contemplating the most important piece of art ever made. He could touch her, but not too much to not spoil her. He would put his face closer to her to watch all those details people would not pay attention to at all and were of an incalculable magnificence.

Something, a voice deep inside his head told him that, looking at her like that, was causing a scene. But he didn't care; he just didn't care. He felt like shouting his love for the girl he has in his arms.

He knew that words weren't needed anymore. He needed to physically take her; he had already taken her with words and he needed more. And he knew she wanted that too. He needed to demonstrate to her how much he cared, how much she mattered to him.

Again, they were so absorbed into each other (because he told it; he told himself that Anne was passing through the same thing he was with him in her arms), they didn't notice it was their third song dancing together. They listened people speak, and some of them whistle and nervously laugh at them; but they just didn't care.

As a counter-spell bewitched them, they woke up from their state and, a mortified Anne, flew from the room, leaving Gilbert on the dance floor alone looking at her bewildered.

"What are you waiting for?" Diana, who happened to be there shouted at him to make a reaction on him. She hadn't been near her the whole night, but she knew her bosom friend and knew what it should be done for once. "Go after her, for God's sake, and tell her you love her!"

And so he did.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

How had she let herself involve herself in her own imagination? How could she let everyone see her heart? How could she let people see her most ardent and true desire for Gilbert? She might have been too obvious; she saw it in the faces of the audience who were looking at them, with a knowledgeably smile laughing at her frankness.

She just wanted to disappear; not to be seen the rest of the night. She was so ashamed… and has ashamed Gilbert too. "Oh, Anne," she told herself while tears as pearls fell from her eyes "will you ever stop being like that?"

She spotted the library. No one would enter into a library in a party; she would be safe there.

Little did she know she was being followed, and even a voice was calling her name, she didn't dare to see who might be.

She entered the library and closed the door. She saw a spot near the big window, which fully illuminated the room and a table and sat herself on the floor. She hid her face on her palms and cried harder than she did on her way there.

That's why she didn't hear the door open and close and the footsteps approaching her.

"Anne" said a warm voice, his voice. "Why are you crying your heart out?"

"Oh, Gilbert" she managed to say through hiccups, " I'm so sorry I have embarrassed you in front of those people. I shouldn't not have done that, I should… I should…" She couldn't finish, feeling more distraught at it whenever she remembered.

"You didn't embarrass anyone, Anne. Not me at least. I promise you you did nothing of that." Gilbert said, kneeling before her and taking her hands off her face to look at her and calm her. He didn't know how he did it, but he had the remedy to calm Anne down; her breath, little by little, began to be more relaxed, as well as her face. "It is true I have felt overwhelmed, but not the way you think I have…"

Anne looked at him doubtful; he was telling her he was shocked by what just happened, but not in a bad way.

She was again closer to him. And he was closer to her. More and more and more… till it happened.

Their lips met. It was slow, mortally slow. They were embracing what that kiss was telling them: their fears, their hopes; everything that was not needed to say, because they already felt and knew it. His lips were softer than she thought they would be. He tasted like the apple tart given at desert and some alcoholic drink she couldn't identify. She never knew why, but she knew Gilbert would taste like apples.

Anne's lips were as Gilbert always thought they would be: tender and velverlike. She was gentle to him, caressing every second that passed between them.

It was Anne who pushed away first, and standing, lifted Gilbert from his position, took his face in her hands and kissed him impetuously. He answered with the same enthusiasm and took her in his arms, putting his hands around her lower back and the bare skin of her back, pushing her closer to him.

They didn't know how many times they wished to do this. That night at his place wasn't the first time, but was the closest they ever had been till date. It was all happening; it seemed like a living dream. At one moment, she had to pinch herself to convince herself it was real, but still couldn't distinguish reality from her imagination.

Never-ending time passed while they kissed and laughed at nothing and caressed each other as precious items. But, again (yet different to other times), something broke their bubble and took them apart. They rested their foreheads into each other 's, noses touching and, again, happily giggling. They just couldn't help that stupidly happiness.

"Anne?! Gilbert!? Party's over! Time to rest!" And a little drunk Cole shouted looking for them.

"That's right, Gilbby; you need to take your lovely friend home; she's tired as hell!" Winnie shouted too, in a similar state.

"How much time has passed here?" Anne asked, trying to hold Gilbert near her as much as possible.

"I don't know… but it passed in a blink of an eye" he laughed, playing with Anne's hair.

"I don't want you to leave", she confessed, embracing him tight and hiding her face in his chest. God… it felt so good; she could really not believe that everything was fine.

"I don't want to leave either. But you know that I can't; and it kills me." He gave a tender kiss on her temple and hid his face on the top of her head. "This is the start of something, isn't it?" He said.

"It is," she said, and held him tighter.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Next morning, he woke up in his bed. He wasn't the same person that left that room almost twelve hours ago. He slept till it was near 2pm; it was normal: they arrived home near five in the morning.

He rolled in the bed and faced his photos: he widely smiled remembering his kisses with his red-headed. His Anne, his Anne with an E. If it wasn't because of his headache, he would shout till he was breathless he loved Anne. "Wow, look at you" Gilbert said to himself, "who would ever call you that romantic". He chuckled and raised him from the bed. Winnie wasn't anywhere to sight, so he presumed she might be asleep yet. He went to the bathroom and, when he went out, he found her with two mugs filled with coffee and a bright, big smile on her face.

"I want to know everything," she said while handing a mug to him.

They spoke at length about his impressions and feelings, and Winifred could not be more happy for his friend.

"I know you wouldn't last long without doing something." She squeezed his hand. " I'm so happy for you, Gilbert. You don't know how much. Yesterday I spoke to her about us." She said, and Gilbert looked preoccupied: he knew Anne would judge her, but their friendship started bad and for a moment he was frightened that something wrong would have happened. "She understood, and accepted me." She said with happy tears on her eyes. "Well, she didn't say anything, but I know she understood. And her hug made it all clear to me".

"She's fantastic. She is just… The best one can ask for" Gilbert smiled.

"She's the one… By the way, I don't want to overshadow you, but you know this girl, the Andrews one?" Winnie asked, looking at her mug.

"Jane or Prissy?", asked Gilbert, a little lost.

"Prissy. Well… Guess with whom had a great night yesterday" smugly asked Winnie.

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"I cannot believe she is still sleeping" Cole said himself before opening the door. "Anne! Wake up!" he just got into her room "I know you are gaining the time you lost with Gilbert last night in the library after Winnie and I interrupted, but Diana is having the time she didn't have last night with Jerry and their moans are unbearable, and I need someone to talk about yesterday events. And not only the party… I WANT YOU TO TELL ME EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU!"

Anne could not think clearly. Her head spinned and took her time to realise where she was and who was speaking to her. After a couple of seconds -which seemed hours- Anne could remember everything: people, places, dinner time, dance, Winnie's story, the dance with Gilbert, Charlie… but everything was blurry. After she left the ballroom, she felt dizzy and could not distinguish between what really happened and her imagination.

She was petrified.

"Cole? Did you see Gilbert and me together in the library?"

"Well, no. Neither Winifred, but we assumed they were you."

"And did you see Charlie after I left the ballroom?" She asked quietly, her nerves being heated.

"I saw him leave seconds later Gilbert left chasing you" Cole, joining the dots, sat near Anne and looked as petrified as she did. " Aren't you suggesting…"

"I might have kissed Charlie".

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Quarantine has helped me to finish this (and, subsequently, to avoid keeping up with my studies).  
> Please, wash your hands, keep social distance, do not go out unless it is really necessary and follow all the recommendations they are given to us.  
> My country is one on the top list with deceased people in this, unfortunately, interational ranking. Take this seriously; but not fear it. We need to be strong, and feel terrified won't help.  
> Stay strong and safe. <3 (old school heart, yep)
> 
> Please, share, comment and leave kudos! You can find me on tumblr (even though I only repost things; not very interesting): @missgrelig


	3. The lighthouse in the storm

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I'm coming back sooner than I expected. Quarantine is giving me a little more of free time and has given me the opportunity to put my imagination and writing to work pretty well.  
> In my initial draft this chapter was thought to be the very last one of this "initially" one-shot about our beloved Shirbert. However, as I was finishing it, one last idea came to me that could fit for the perfect epilogue to this story. I'm not quite sure if I'll write that, but -just in case I don't- I think this chapter can fulfil the role of "happy ending".  
> I'm sorry for the spelling errors, pucntuation mistakes and the selection of words that can sound odd for you. English is not my first language and writing fiction in English helps me to "experiment" with the language and thus get the proficiency I want to achieve.  
> One last thing before reading: his new chapter lacks of certainty about medical practices, classes and so on in order to fit it with the story being told. I did some research to make it as reliable as possible, but it just didn't fit with what I wanted to tell and gave myself "writer rights". I'm sorry if someone doesn't feel right about it.  
> Enjoy!

Anne was happy. Well, she was truly delighted: finally she could call herself an English and literature teacher and could not wait any minute more to start the thrilling way of teaching and learning. Finals were beyond good; she didn’t get the outstanding that she hoped for, but was second on her promotion. Besides, Summer finally arrived too (even though she preferred Spring and Autumn) and Anne was thrilled for that summer to happen: she was coming back to Green Gables to help out Marilla and Matthew with the farm at the same time she found a job as a private tutor in a summer academy in Avonlea, where she was promised to be well paid. In those terms, she could feel successful. Diana’s party meant a time-out that Anne tried hard to make up for the following two weeks before these exams and, despite she actually did so, she didn’t finish as she actually expected. However, Anne would not complain at all. She managed to make up her studies in order to shut that little voice in her head telling her about Gilbert. Actually, even though she tried to evade it and to pretend it wasn’t a big deal for her as much as possible, Anne was quite sad with that part of her life.

In all those four weeks after the party, they didn’t talk to each other; less the supposed kiss she had with him. And this time, it wasn’t like other times where they did know the other was busy and knew he/she couldn’t be as he/she liked to be with the other. Now Gilbert willingly was ignoring her, and answered (if he felt like doing it) some message with a cold distance between them. Anne could not understand why he was like that so sudden. She tried to make things clear and ask him what was going on, but he always dodged to answer her openly and, loosely, tell her he was busy with his last days of practices at the hospital. Anne knew it was an excuse, but she didn’t want to pressure him when he was busy. One mistake she made with Roy was to be irritable before Roy could express himself; so, when they broke up, Anne promised herself to control that aspect that not only was a reason to end their relationship, but also caused trouble with her parents and friends.

Anne tried hard not to dwell on that; she even tried to convince herself that she was experiencing a stupid crush with him and she would get over it. Diana and Cole tried to talk sense to her, but something Anne is known for is her stubbornness, so they decided to stop trying and let her realise by herself. Diana and Cole even talked with Winnie to know the other point of view, but she (obviously) supported her friend, and commented to them that Gilbert was mad at Anne and it was better to speak with him once he felt more calm about the issue. Although it sounded pessimistic, Winnie gave hope: “He is in love with her; and would do anything to make her happy or help her with anything even in this shitty mood of his. But, firstly, Gilbert needs time with himself before making things clear with her. I should not say this… But Gilbert is extremely loyal to those who he loves; and when he is hurt by something the other person did, he needs time to think whether to keep going with such a person or end any kind of relationship they had. It sounds drastic, but Gilbert tends to make the right choice, and I believe he will amend things with Anne; he is not that hurt but his pride speaks of himself sometimes. I told you: he is lovesick”.

Anne did forget a little bit that night where her finals’ marks were given about her relationship with Gilbert, when Diana bought a bottle of their favourite wine and pasta from their favourite restaurant in order to celebrate Anne’s results and celebrate Diana's excellent results in her Music degree. They did not speak about sensitive issues, and behaved as that first 'tea party' at fifteen when they got drunk with that not-so-hidden bottle of Raspberry Cordial. 

All seemed fine, and was fine; until 1am, when their ‘party’ was long over and both of them were asleep in their own bedrooms.

“Marilla?” answered a sleepy Anne to a sudden phone call. She was so sleepy she didn’t register what time it was.

“Anne,” tearful Marilla managed to say. “Anne, it’s Matthew.”

“Matthew?” Anne became alert. She sat up in her bed, ready for whatever Marilla would say next. “Marilla, what happened? Is he…?” She couldn’t finish; tears invading her face imagining the terrible end.

“He suffered a heart attack, Anne. I didn’t do what to do; I thought my little brother died in my arms...” Marilla whispered through her tears. She controlled herself a little bit and informed Anne, who was shocked and crying silently too: “He is in Charlottetown; he is being tested right now and in a few hours they will inform me. I thank Rachel was at home that moment when all happened and she called 911 to know what to do and save him.”

Anne did not answer. She could not speak a word. She was relieved Matthew was alive, even though things could change in seconds. She could not stay in Toronto any minute longer. She stood up and began pacing her room up and down, her mind running fast thinking on everything she had to take with her. “I’ll be there as soon as possible Marilla. You hear me? I’ll be there in a couple of hours. Call me with anything. I love you; and if you can, tell Matthew I love him; just in case.” She shouted without realising, making Diana to enter in her room and finding Anne as dreadful as she had never seen her. Anne had her mobile phone on her hand, with an ended call on it. Diana threw herself to Anne and, before Diana could touch her, Anne felt to her knees and shouted. Diana was crying too, and did not know what she could do to help her. However, Diana’s mind went quick to that doctor who could do something.

* * *

“Anne, please, sit down. You just suffered a panic attack and right now, preparing your luggage I rather say it's not the best thing to do.” Gilbert tried once again. He had previously faced stubborn Anne, but this was to a different level. He felt like some average person speaking on the TV about nothing to whom no one is actually paying attention. He was trying to keep himself calm too: the image of a ghastly, pale Anne (paler than she actually is) with bloodshot eyes, sitting on the floor crying silent tears was an image Gilbert never hoped to see in her ever again if he had the chance. He prefered to be killed than seeing Anne like that. In fact, he didn’t know how he had managed to act professionally with her and calm her a little bit; but thanks God or whatever that he could. However, after that, they passed most of the time arguing about everything and anything, and Gilbert was already tired of it.

“Of course. My father almost died, the likelihood of suffering another is close to too much. You are a doctor; you should know it better than me, Gilbert. Of course I’m going to sit on the bloody sofa and wait for Mrs. Rachel Lynde’s or Marilla’s phone call that Matthew is dead and I couldn’t say goodbye to him.” She bitterly said, with a shaking voice. Gilbert knew Anne wasn’t actually insulting directly to him, but he needed to talk sense to her. He, at least, tried to help and began to fold and place in a suitcase all the clothes Anne was throwing in her bed.

“Anne, it is precisely me who can understand you the most, remember?” He began to lose his patience, something he wasn’t very proud of; but he didn’t know what else to do. “I know you want to get there as soon as possible-”

“Right, I need to be there now and you talking to me about sitting down and shit is not helping me at all. I need to catch a flight.” She told him while taking a t-shirt he was holding, signalling him to leave her alone.

“It would be the case if the earliest flight weren’t at 7am, and right now it is 3:27am. Diana is doing her best to find something earlier in her room, you know?” he refuted exasperatedly.

“Then I’ll hire a car, a taxi, a lorry or a flying boat. But I need to be there. I need to see him one last time if that’s the case and I need to thank him personally for everything he did for me and for loving me at first glance when nobody ever did before.” She couldn’t hold her tears anymore and, looking at Gilbert with big eyes, let them go. Gilbert now approached her and, grasping her shoulders, embraced her tightly. Firstly, she was stiff in his arms, but little by little she began to relax and reacted to the embrace imitating him. She hid her face on the crook of his neck and allowed herself to pour all her pain. Anne knew what Gilbert was trying to do, and knew he was right: she needed to calm herself first to actually start functioning well enough. She began to feel relaxed, and to notice that whatever happened she would have Marilla, her friends and Gilbert.

Gilbert noticed too how Anne was calming herself a little bit, though weeping did not stop at all. He would not blame her; she needed to do it before anything. She needed to cry the scare of almost losing her father. Gilbert knew little about Anne before she was adopted, but he knew that the foster family she stayed with before the Cuthberts were everything but nice to her. In them she found the family love she was deprived from her birth and almost losing a part of it was heartrending. Gilbert knew, unfortunately, about it enough and he tried in his embrace to make her know he would never let her go. Despite their previous odd weeks, he would be there forever for her. Because he loves her.

Just when Anne’s tears were lessening, Diana entered the room. She sadly smiled seeing them in that embrace; she knew how much secretly Anne suffered about her relationship with this man, and the way he was holding her indicated that he had an unfunny time too. Diana cleared her throat to make herself there and deliver the outcomes of her search.

“I’m sorry, Anne. I couldn’t find something earlier than that flight at 7. And I tried to exchange your tickets for your imminent flight, but it’s quite expensive.” Diana tried to not alarm Anne with the information, while both of them sat on Anne’s bed.

“Can’t you cancel and recover part of the money?” Gilbert asked.

“Yes; but less than it should be. I took notice of Diana’s advice and hired a kind of travel insurance just in cases like these.” Anne said, giving a sad smirk to her friend, who took her hand. 

“Then I suggest that you cancel it and buy another one with that money if it's possible.” Gilbert said, but Anne’s face darkened a bit.

“But, Anne,” Diana concerned whispered, trying to cover what she was about to say from Gilbert, “you told me that you were almost in the red...”

“But I can make it with the returned money and some other money. Don’t worry.” She tried to assure her, but even she couldn’t really tell if it was going to be enough.

“I’ll pay it. Besides, I’ll go with you, Anne.” Gilbert abruptly said.

“What are you talking about?” Anne answered Gilbert's proposition proudly. “I will not accept it; I don’t need charity. Thank you.”

“It’s not charity Anne. I try to give you the solution for you to go with your family as soon as possible”. Gilbert said, sensing that stubborn Anne was present in the room again.

“But I can make it with my own money, Gilbert; I don’t need a loan from you.”

“It isn’t a loan. I willingly give it to you.”

“Are your finances buoyant, indeed?” Anne shooted.

“They are and you know it Anne. You can hold that against me.” He said knowingly. His father made clear on his will that a small part of the benefits (quite a lot for a person who did not work there) of the company he founded were annuity for his son.

Anne knew that Gilbert was right (again), and knew too that she would be almost penniless after paying the ticket. Green Gables wasn’t at its best economically speaking. Harvest hadn’t been as profitable as previous years, the farmhouse had needed to be urgently repaired and, despite the fact Anne earned and spent wisely money with some summer jobs and sporadic jobs in the city, Toronto was an expensive city. She would use all her money gained that summer to pay Matthew’s hospitals bills. She looked at Gilbert, considering seriously to accept it… Even though she would return every penny that damned ticket cost.

“But why will you come with me? And what about your practice?” Anne asked, confused.

“I- I-” Gilbert stammered trying to organise all he wanted to say. Diana, who was the witness of that conversation, smiled amused, as somehow that argument reminded her of Jerry and hers. Gilbert continued: ”Well… Even though I don’t have the paper it says ‘I am a doctor’, emm… I am. And, although it is not my area, I can easily understand the results or anything that must be done with him. I don’t mean that your mother or you don’t understand them, but I can be helpful. And regarding practices, well… I know I can ask for a kind of time-out and then make up that time I lost… And I don’t care to do the remaining time of those practices throughout summer, so it is almost sorted.” he concluded.

Diana wasn’t sure if Anne saw it too, but in Gilbert’s eyes it was being said what he chose not to utter: he would be there in the case Matthew didn’t survive; he would give her strength and would console her because he knew what it was like and would cry with her. Because both of these two cretins would suffer if they were separated in this awful situation.

“Okay”, Anne agreed after a moment which seemed eternal. “I’ll let you do it. But I’ll pay you back. And that’s final.” Diana smiled on seeing Anne's determination a little bit of Marilla’s one, as well as she was letting others help her; which was quite rare.

“Sure, Anne.” Gilbert agreed (as if he refused her proposition, they would start arguing again) and grinned knowingly to Diana. “Diana, can I use your computer to buy the tickets while you help Anne? I’m sure you will be more useful than me here right now.”

“Sure. And once you buy them, you fly to your house and prepare your own luggage. Is that clear?” Diana commanded.

Once Gilbert finished, he did as he was commanded. Diana, after walking him to the door and agreeing what time he would come over to pick up Anne, came back to Anne’s room and tried to say to her friend that the man that just left their apartment was utterly in love with her. Anne denied it, and offered as a reason those four funny weeks between them. Diana, knowing that such conversation would aggravate her friend’s mood, decided not to say anything else. But she knew this time was decisive in their relationship and at the end, Anne and Gilbert would become that awaited item.

……………………

After a two-hours flight, Anne and Gilbert found themselves in Charlottetown’s airport. The flight for them was actually quicker than they expected, as they fell asleep at the minute of taking off and awakened just when they landed. They managed to rent a car (which Anne paid, after arguing again with Gilbert in less than twelve hours) and headed to the hospital. On their way there, Diana called Anne to know if the flight went well. After several comments, Diana informed her:

“I have rented a flat near the hospital for Marilla, Gilbert and you stay while Matthew is in hospital. I don’t know how much time he will be admitted there and a daily journey from Avonlea to Charlottetown is not something none of you need to expose yourself.”

“Diana! Why did you do so? I didn’t say-.” Anne emotionally began to say, but she was cut off.

“Because I wanted so, Anne. And you know I’m right and I want to be helpful to you and your family somehow. You all have always been nice, good and helpful to me and my family. And I want to show you how grateful I am the only way I can.” Diana answered crying too, as Anne began to cry.

“Thank you Diana. For everything. But you know I’ll pay you back as soon as possible” Anne rushed to say. Diana laughed:

“As Marilla and you, too, my dearest Anne, would say: Fiddlesticks!”

The conversation kept going a little bit longer, and they said their goodbyes. As it had been a hand-free call, Gilbert heard everything and also felt touched with it.

“Why don’t you let yourself be helped by people?” asked Gilbert, regretting saying anything a second later. She looked at him taken aback. It was actually the first time she was asked so. People just assumed why she behaved so. She pondered how to answer that a little while and finally said:

“You know? People just assume that. They never ask me directly and, not gonna lie, they get it right. But, just don’t ask... Like they don't want to know from first-hand or something.” she tucked a strand of hair behind her left ear -so that Gilbert could see better her face- while looking straight through the car’s glass -but actually looking to past events. "I let people help me; well sort of." she added after noticing Gilbert's sceptical glance. "But I don't want anybody's money…

"I used to live with this family, the Hammonds, when I was nine. I lived with them for two years. They were three pairs of twins and two little children. All they said to me was that I would end up taking people's money without doing a shit because I was an useless child for them. They wanted someone who helped them while they were working - dealers have a quite rare working hours apparently: evenings and nights. I couldn't bring money because of my age and I couldn't even take care of their children as they wanted me to do because 'I had homework to do and school to attend'. Not only mention the not-so-nice depiction I received from them and other children in school. I guess I was lucky that the Government makes adults send children to school; it saved me." Gilbert was silent, listening to her. He didn't feel that level of “sorrow” people used to feel for her (which was a relief: she didn't want to be pitied at all), but impotence for her having lived in such a situation. "One of the teachers, I don't remember her name, which is a shame, called Social Services after I collapsed in one of her classes. I remember being starving, tired and filthy; since I was not their child, they did not care enough for me, just that little that allowed me to stay with them and 'help' them. My nightmare ended that day I mentioned. And for the next two years all I did was go to the therapist and keep up with my studies, because that secured me a hopeful future and made me really happy and optimistic. Then a miracle happened a few months to thirteen: a pair of siblings wanted to adopt a boy to help them with their farm and small family business, but something in the process was misunderstood and I ended up going there. At first they were taken aback because they expected a boy and not a bony red-headed girl." 

She smiled to that memory, and Gilbert smiled, a little bit bitter because of the story, to see her smile. When he asked, he didn't expect her to expose her like that. And he was glad she did so; it meant she felt safe with him; she felt secure enough to open up to him and tell him all her painful past. She continued: "I could notice they did not want me at first; to say otherwise would be to lie. But I worked hard to make them realise I was the right person, and I even promised to them I would make money as soon as I could to help them economically. Matthew, the day I left for University, told me they fell in love with me and loved me as their own child since the first second they saw me; as well all the people in Avonlea, even though those nasty people who were so blind of seeing the light within me."

"I totally agree with Matthew." Gilbert said, putting his hand unconsciously over her knee and giving it a squeeze, without looking at her -and losing Anne’s pleasantly surprised look. "You amaze people wherever you go, and give hope, light and love to us all. It is impossible not to like someone like you, because you help others more than yourself. You have become one of the greatest women I have ever met, and I admire you." Gilbert, realising he almost exposed himself and his feelings for her without knowing at which point they were in their relationship, put his hand out of her knee, put it back on the steering wheel and added trying to redirect his words towards the question he uttered before: "People just want to help you the best way they can because, you might not be fully aware, you have helped them before."

Anne was amazed at Gilbert's words. She started crying while exposing her childhood trauma before him, but now she was pouring happy tears at realising, once again, that she did deserve people who loved her. Anne knew Gilbert wasn't very eloquent, but he knew how to transmit his emotions, feelings and thoughts in very few words. Besides, she could see again that whatever they had before Diana's party was there again; like it never left as she feared. And his hand in her knee, did not help her at all to convince the opposite to that statement.

"Thank you, Gilbert. For everything." She said looking directly in his eyes, taking advantage of them being stopped in a closed traffic light.

"No, Anne. Thank you." He mimicked her, and looked her directly in her eyes.

And again it seemed like they were alone in the world. Anne and Gilbert. Gilbert and Anne. Both of them felt the warmth spreading their bodies and the urgency to demonstrate to each other how deeply they were cared for by the other. However, that moment ended quickly, as the traffic light opened and the car after them beeped for them to move. Gilbert flapped and started the car up. Anne, on the other hand, checked her phone after willingly avoiding all the messages she was receiving from Mrs. Lynde.

"Next street to the left is the way to the hospital. Mrs. Lynde is waiting for me at the main entrance, so that you can find somewhere to park the car and I see Matthew. I'll text you where you can find us and then we organise ourselves about the flat, how we are going to be by Matthew’s side...." Anne rambled, as Gilbert obeyed.

* * *

Two and a half weeks after Matthew’s news two things had happened: the first one was that Matthew was gradually improving, even though he needed to stay at the hospital so that doctors could stabilise him and avoid at all cost expose him to people and risk an infection which worsen, and even kill, him. The second was that all the world was under a pandemic outburst just five days after Matthew’s heart attack, and governments all over the world declared state of emergency and made citizens to stay at home, unless exceptional cases as it were Anne’s.

Marilla, Anne and Gilbert organised so that one of the women could relieve the other to be with Matthew and give the car’s keys to take themselves either to the hospital or the flat according to Gilbert’s schedule. Gilbert was informed of everything before all burst, and was aware of its danger and what was happening in Asia and some countries in Europe; so he instructed Anne and Marilla how they should behave and wash hands for their own and Matthew’s welfare just in case things got bad in Canada, especially in Charlottetown and in that precise hospital. However, he never believed it was going to be of such magnitude and be the cause of so many deaths around the globe. That’s why, when Canadian government informed citizens (and especially doctors) about the measures to be carried out, and the very first positive cases were being attended in the hospital, he decided to volunteer and be helpful. To this, Anne felt conflicting feelings: she didn’t want him to do it, because that meant he could get infected and could possibly die (of which Anne was terrified); however, she also knew that first thought was selfish of her, and felt proud of Gilbert and his morals… One of the reasons why she fell in love with him. So, with these sentiments on the edge, she supported him, acknowledged him how proud she was of him and helped him with anything she could do - as well as Marilla, who was not blind and sensed what was happening between these two.

Marilla’s affection for Gilbert grew more as days passed. Gilbert had this charming character that, despite the fact he was a little introvert, everyone instantly befriended with him. For such reason, always being as meticulous and careful as possible to not cause problems, whenever Gilbert could he sneaked to Matthew’s room either to have dinner/breakfast/lunch with them, to stay a little with them during his breaks (making Anne or Marilla and Matthew a little lighter the hours spent there with Gilbert’s jokes and stories), to ask about Matthew and companion’s state and to do FaceTime with Anne or Marilla to make sure Matthew was going well. It was during one of those FaceTime calls where Marilla also realised that Matthew did also like Gilbert a lot -without mentioning for their Anne too-, as they both teamed up to tease Anne, making all of them roar with laughter and forget for a while that everything was crashing down.

That night Marilla was at hospital. Both mother and daughter could renew forces the previous day as Rachel Lynde, as stubborn and almost careless as she was but with good intention and heart and ignoring the Stay at Home policy, decided to stay with Matthew all day so that her dearest friend Marilla and Anne could rest. Thankfully, Rachel did stay at home in Avonlea, but she wanted to do something for the Cuthberts, as the farm was already cared by Davy and Dora, the pair of twins Marilla and Matthew hired when, at eighteen, their parents died and needed to work to earn a living. Marilla, always altruistic with her daughter, decided to take Anne’s turn to be with Matthew that night and allow Anne to have a little more rest. They sort of argue, but finally Anne agreed and thought that she could do something different for dinner. By the texts she could exchange with Gilbert that day, she could tell he was having a very rough one.

She was placing all the shopping she did that afternoon at the same time she was preparing all the ingredients for dinner and FaceTiming with Cole and Diana when Gilbert called her.

“Gilbert?” Anne asked, answering the call. “Of course you are Gilbert.” She murmured to herself realising the silliness of her answer.

“Anne, I need a favour. Well, first of all and if it is not... emm... too much, did you already showered?” Anne noticed how Gilbert turned red when asking that, turning herself red too. “ _ Really? After occasionally speaking openly about sex with him you behave like this? _ ” scolded herself, at the same time she reminded herself. “ _ Well, those times you were oblivious of your own feelings for him and didn’t really desire him to see you naked and do certain things with and you. _ ”

“I just did. In fact, I’m preparing some home-made mushroom lasagna for dinner; I bet you would like it.” She answered, hoping such information would cheer him up, as Anne noticed Gilbert wasn’t entirely alright.

“Good.” he only replied. “Coming back to the favour: I need you to open the main door of the building and the one of the flat when I call you again, and do everything I command once I arrive there, ok?”

“Sure, Gilbert. Is something wrong?” she asked with concern.

“No...” Gilbert said in a sigh. “But just in case. I already have the car’s keys and I am about to drive. See you in a moment.” And ended the call.

“See you.” Anne replied to no one. She sent a voice note to her friends explaining what happened in order to calm a little bit herself. If she was worried about Gilbert, that strange phone call made things worse.

Fifteen minutes later, he called her and she did as she was told. Gilbert arrived with tired, bloodshot eyes and haggard and scabby face, not noticing the smell of the lasagna that filled the kitchen and part of the hall and the living room. He directed himself to the bathroom, at the same time he was telling Anne what she had to do:

“Now you need to put some gloves on and take a plastic bag to place all my clothes in it.”

“Wait. What?” She said incredulously behind the bathroom door. Was he really ordening…?

“I’ll be behind the shower curtains and you won’t see anything, don’t worry.” He assured her. “As I was saying: you take the clothes, put them in the bag and you put them in the washing machine to 60º-90º: I wouldn't ask if I didn't consider it needs to be done like that; I promise.”

Anne, still a little bit insecure of that plan, agreed trusting him and did as told once he let her know when she could enter in and do as said.

She was finishing preparing a side dish for their dinner when Gilbert showed up in the kitchen and took from a cupboard some cleaning products in order to cleanse the bathroom. Anne did pay attention to what he was doing, but his physical appearance -despite being whacked- invited her to look at him longer than socially was expected when looking at someone: she did not notice well before, but he was fit; like those guys who went to gym and did nothing but exercise. She knew he usually went to the gym and did exercise, but actually did not pay too much attention to his physical appearance and how attractive she found his body to be. Anne's boys' prototype weren't that type... But there is always an exception to the rule and Gilbert was her exception without doubt. Still, his outfit that night emphasised him: a light grey tracksuit trousers and his characteristic black t-shirt of U of T. Besides, his dark curls were still damped, as well he was wearing his RayBan Havana glasses -something quite rare in him, as he prefered himself without glasses. Anne also could tell how shattered he was that it was his fourth day without shaving; which made his jawline and his explendid chin more marked and alluring. 

He disappeared from the kitchen without noticing Anne’s look on him and Anne daydreamt of touching his beard at the same time Gilbert put his strong arms around her in a lovely hug. She knew that was impossible due to physical contact was -sort of- forbidden and that he was a doctor exposed openly to the deadly virus, so he was the last person allowed to touch. Yet, she was gifted with an extraordinary imagination…

She ‘awoke’ of her dream when Gilbert accidentally closed the cupboard harder than he wanted after placing the products he used to clean the bathroom, scaring Anne. He sat down on one of the stools of the high table placed in the middle of the kitchen, just opposite to Anne.

As minutes passed, silence became overwhelming. Anne, who was giving the finishing touch to dinner to look at him, decided to break that silence: “Marilla told me that Matthew was ok today. He was tested again, but Mrs. Lynde didn’t understand anything doctors told her and we have to wait for tomorrow. Also, Mrs. Lynde was quite disappointed that ‘That doctor friend of Anne’ did not appear in the whole day.” Anne chuckled. “Well, I bet she came just to take notice of you; and since you haven’t been around today she must feel upset. Matthew indeed missed you today. He expected the good doctor and his personal clown to steal some laughs today.” As Anne didn’t notice any feedback from Gilbert, she finally looked at him.

Gilbert was found with his face hidden in his palms. He wasn’t crying, but Anne knew it was possible in no time. She left what she was doing and placed herself beside him. She put her hand on his shoulder and began caressing his back. Once she noticed he was a little bit more relaxed, Anne hugged him, whose embrace was returned back, and said: “You know you can tell me anything if you want to, Gilbert”.

He pushed back, so that they could see each other easily, not too much to still be close to her and narrated: “Today I have attended a risky labour… It was a complicated C-section, and the mother almost didn't survive. There were chances that the child was lacking oxygen in the uterus, and the mother wasn’t feeling the regular symptoms of labouring, so neither me and my team didn’t want to take risks and speed it up.” Gilbert sighed with trembling, fighting back his tears, and drew a small smile. “Everything was fine at the end. Both the mother and her daughter are fine. The baby is also red-headed, you know?; like her father, who was waiting for them in their assigned room.” Anne smiled too despite the lump in her throat because of the happy ending and pitied the child, as a red-headed herself who hated it. Gilbert, however, didn’t finished:

“But we’ve got in trouble… Just before attending to this woman, the team and I were attending to a pregnant woman who is infected with the virus.” Anne, who was caressing him again, stopped. Her heartbeats were so fast and deafening she thought she was about to collapse on the floor. No, that nightmare couldn’t be happening. She didn’t know how she kept listening to his voice during those seconds where horror seized her; it could be her like a boat in the middle of a storm which descries a lighthouse and is saved: “That was so reckless of us… But we needed to save them; I needed to save them. I don’t even know how we disinfected and changed ourselves to carry out everything. But everything is fine.” He repeated again, as he was trying to convince himself of it.

“We are not suspended because of the lack of staff and the extraordinary events we are living in, but we have been both congratulated on our quick response and performance and reprimanded for the method. And we have been tested with a quick test… We all are clean.” Both Anne and Gilbert expelled the air they didn’t know they were holding in their lungs, and started to cry happy tears. “I was terrified. I have been locked in a room waiting for the results in case I was infected. I have also sent someone to Marilla to fetch the keys and not to put them at risk. I have been frightened before; but not like this.”, he took a gasp of hair and blew it out, preparing himself to say something. “What if I were infected? And that’s not the worst thing; what if I infected you or Marilla or Matthew? I wouldn’t forgive it to myself; to do it to you all. No one deserves it, but it would be grievous for me; to not be sure if I’m doing things right to help you and the people who raised you as theirs, and for having exposed you and your parents to it.”

Those words and the feelings behind them completely moved Anne. She saw the humbleness and professionality which characterised Gilbert as a doctor. And not only that: he put her and her family before him. It was not something she didn’t notice before during these weeks, but that was the ultimate evidence she didn’t know she needed. And she couldn’t fight it back anymore.

Anne took his face between her hands and kissed him. It lasted a few seconds, as she soon realised that she was kissing him and she couldn’t do it: firstly, because she made obvious she loved him, and secondly because she could not physically interact with anybody in order to not get infected. Anne pushed back, but before she was too far to reach, Gilbert took her by the wrist to put her again close to him and kissed her back. This time, the kiss lasted longer, and they tried to transmit everything they wanted to say to each other. They stayed like that a little bit longer, Anne moving away first to take breath and to put her forehead against his. “Well, if you were infected, now I am too”. Anne said and both chuckled to it. Anne added: “But I would do it again without a shadow of doubt.”

Gilbert, with his eyes still closed, happily drew a grin on his lips and caressed her cheek, trying to feel her under his fingertips to convince himself that was real, he was not delirious or dreaming. He teased: “I’ve been tested and I’m negative, calm yourself. You can kiss as much as you want.” Now, he opened his eyes to look at her directly and to confess something that was tormenting him: “I thought you wouldn’t do it again.” Anne looked at him clueless. What did she do before? Gilbert answered that silent question: “It was at Diana’s party, we were in the library and we kissed. I asked you if that was the start of something between us and you confirmed it. But after that you didn’t say anything and I figured out you just didn’t reciprocate me and you didn’t want to talk about it again…” Gilbert, while he was speaking, looked at how something inside of Anne joined dots and how some feelings changed for others as these dots connected.

“That’s why you dodged me… You thought I didn’t like you back. Oh, Gilbert. I’m so sorry my foolishness was the cause of your dismay. That night I was severely drunk, and after, umm… _freshening_ me up - I won’t tell you, Gil, don’t arch your elbow” she said with a smile after he did so playfully. God, she missed this teasing between them. “As I was saying: After freshening up, I felt better, but still was tipsy and I… I...” Anne didn’t know how to say it without sounding too silly, so she promptly said it: “I woke up next day confused to whom I kissed and I didn’t know if it were you or Charlie even though I desperately desired it were you; so I didn’t say anything to you because that would me confessing I... I like you a lot and I wasn’t ready for losing you.”

“Seriously, Anne?” he only said to it, after several seconds in total silence pondering and accepting pleasantly Anne's explanation.

“Seriously, _what_?” she asked back.

“First the Charlie thing. Didn’t you notice he left the party just when we started to dance together? I mean; when you took me in your hands, it seemed to me that the world faded away and only were you and me in that room... But I could see how Charlie left the room with a not very friendly face. I even pitied him a little; if the girl I like didn't return my feelings I would be totally broken-hearted.” Anne denied, and told him that she was so focused on him and memorising how attractive he looked for her that Anne didn’t notice anything that wasn't them. Anne felt how her cheeks blushed, and scolded Gilbert for flattering himself and the effect he had on her - although she also flatted herself for their upgrading in their relationship. “Ok, I won’t feel too proud for us; it will be a difficult task, though. Did you really think I would laugh at you for confessing your feelings?”

“No, but I was afraid that our relationship wasn’t the same after that. I didn’t want to lose our friendship. I appreciate your company a lot, Gilbert. I have many friends and I love them and how I feel with them… But it is totally different with you. It goes beyond everything to all extents. I am a better version of myself; I don’t feel like I was the last person to come to the group, the person that needed to be introduced to everyone. I feel like I’m not an orphan. Just Anne. And you know I don’t like very much being Anne. You even make me like my hair.” she laughed while crying, as she did finally confess her true feelings for him and was hopeful they were mutual.

The confirmation that he liked her back was bought with a kiss initiated by him. Now, he pushed back to claim: “This kiss means this is me, and if you allow me, it would be me now and all that time you want me to be. Also, this means that you are not only liked, but loved. You are the fond object of my affection and desire, my Anne with an E. You also make a better version of me; you also make me like those aspects of me I don’t like at all, forget that I'm an orphan too and I'm Gilbert, and everything that I feel with you is beyond anything I feel with other people. So, Anne, I need to ask it again: is this the start of something?”

“Yes, Gilbert. This is.” and sealed that promise with another kiss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked it! And, you know, love always wins!  
> But please: Do not kiss/hug/have physical contact with others in real life! For the story's plot -and our interest as shippers- this is fantastic, but not in real life. Stay distant now because, in that way, we'll be able to do it again soon.
> 
> Please, share, comment and leave kudos! You can find me on tumblr (even though I only repost things; I'm still trying to understand how it works): @missgrelig

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you like it!  
> Please, leave your comments and your kudos, I'll answer them as soon as possible! :)
> 
> My Tumblr page is: @missgrelig


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